There is the old, tried and true method....vice grip one brake line shut. LOL. Sorry..that was the old 'fix' when we had a bad wheel cylinder back when I was in high-school.
Trust me, that has crossed my mind!!!
OK....so I'm not the only one that got creative in their youth when money was tight!
Never, ever argue with an IDIOT. They will drag you to their level and then beat you with their years of experience
