If I don't see at least one G** D*** deer a week on my way to work its a F*****G christmas miracle!
The closest call was a couple years back in the wee hours of the morning. I was driving a beat to heck '73 Challenger up a rural road trying to beat the clock, when out of the corner of my eye, I see a stupid deer running full blast to cross the road in front of me. I swerved toward its butt end while slamming on the brakes, pitching the car into a slide at 60mph. Narrowly missing the deer, I furiously sawed back & forth on the wheel while working the brakes & gas and managed to keep the Dodge outta the ditches while keeping my underpants in a mostly un-sullied state. I hate deer.
Dug this back up because, sure enough a couple weeks ago I had a deer strike... or rather, the deer hit me... two actually.
On my way to work, in the dark, going around a curve at 55mph. Since it was on a curve I had no time to stop, just react. I start driving into the curve & surprise! 5 effing deer standing in the middle of the road! I swerved & threaded the needle through the biggest gap in the group of them. Thankfully, I hit none head on, but TWO of those furry retards slammed into the right side of my Magnum, denting both doors. Incredibly, no windows broke & the mirror was fine. I hope I knocked their stupid teeth out so they starve to death. I hate deer.
Then this morning, I left my house & went on my merry way, up the gravel road to go to work. I pop up over a hill doing about 50 & see a familiar shape run across the road with a second one just getting ready to cross. I pitched the car into a slide to scrub off speed & missed the deer, wrangled the car back into control, & continued on to work. I think I need a new job where I work from home. I hate deer.
