"If you are one of those guys that wash your car with water..."

What else are you supposed to use? Milk? Virgin tears?
Driving on the street means that you can and will pick up all sorts of crud. I see these guys using spray bottles and a soft cloth to "wash" their cars, but I can't see that stuff taking off road tar or chewing gum, let alone a stream of wheel bearing grease squirted out of a Chevy brake rotor on the turd next to you.