Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby #2989150
11/25/21 09:23 PM
11/25/21 09:23 PM
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 11,269
Slantytown
DUFFMAN Offline OP
Ask And Ye Shall Receive
DUFFMAN  Offline OP
Ask And Ye Shall Receive

Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 11,269
Slantytown
For the last 4-5 years my interest in my Mopars has been fading, to the point where I was trying to sell my pride and joy. It turns out that the friends I was hanging out with were dragging me down. Their only interest was hanging out and drinking. They had no motivation to do anything but drink and complain. It took a real tole on me mentally as I thrive on accomplishing things.

Unfortunately things came to a head in the worse possible way. It started with someone I thought was a friend criticizing me for pretty much all that I am. Then the gaslighting began and a complete circle of what I thought were friends turned against me. The more I defended myself the worse the attacks got. It was painful, and I still have PTSD from it 8 months later, but it's turned out for the better. I'm back enjoying the things that define me as a person. This includes my wife and kids. I'm spending more time at home with the people and activities I love. It's weird how something so wrong, and what my so called friends did was terrifying, could turn out for the better.

I have a son that's 15 1/2 which is stirring his interest in cars. Today, even though he just has a learners permit, I taught him to drive stick. He really wants a Cummins Ram and I'm working hard to find one for him. It's going to be older so he'll have a project on his hands.

Sorry to dump out my purse here, but this community has always been very supportive, and at this point I have very few close friends left.


No longer taking $h!t from anyone!
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: DUFFMAN] #2989152
11/25/21 09:39 PM
11/25/21 09:39 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 16,954
Between Houston & Galveston TX
SattyNoCar Offline
Smarter than no class Flappergass by a mile
SattyNoCar  Offline
Smarter than no class Flappergass by a mile

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 16,954
Between Houston & Galveston TX


Congrats on not letting them win! Glad to see things are turning around for you!

penguin


John

The dream is dead, long live the dream.......😥
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: SattyNoCar] #2989154
11/25/21 09:48 PM
11/25/21 09:48 PM
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 11,269
Slantytown
DUFFMAN Offline OP
Ask And Ye Shall Receive
DUFFMAN  Offline OP
Ask And Ye Shall Receive

Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 11,269
Slantytown
It's tough to not be mad at them for what happened, but in the end they have to live with their own insecurities that lead them to this. I've done a lot of research and I understand more about what happened. In the end they're the ones who continue to suffer.


No longer taking $h!t from anyone!
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: DUFFMAN] #2989156
11/25/21 10:15 PM
11/25/21 10:15 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 21,765
N.E. OHIO, USA
A12 Online content
Too Many Posts
A12  Online Content
Too Many Posts

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 21,765
N.E. OHIO, USA

up up

[Linked Image]

Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: A12] #2989327
11/26/21 01:18 PM
11/26/21 01:18 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 21,834
A collage of whims
topside Offline
Too Many Posts
topside  Offline
Too Many Posts

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 21,834
A collage of whims
Life is too short to hang with toxic people.
Just went through a similar kind of deal @ Thanksgiving; the facade was finally dropped and my gut feeling confirmed.
I'm not butthurt - mental toughness is more precious than wasted affection, and pays better dividends.
The truth isn't always attractive, but better to accept & deal with it than to waste your time with what's essentially BS.

Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: topside] #2989367
11/26/21 04:04 PM
11/26/21 04:04 PM
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 1,593
Michigan
K
Kiddart Offline
pro stock
Kiddart  Offline
pro stock
K

Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 1,593
Michigan
Duff,

you did the right thing, cut your losses and you are going to be much happier down the road. My son is now 24 and we spend as much time in the garage as we can. His life and mine get in the way a lot but I wont trade any of our time for a bottle of beer and arguments with those that think i am an idiot for wanting to restore an old car or put a coat of wax on one of the cars and talk about the good old days

we have good times in the garage working on our cars, he likes it and so do i.

My wife knows we are safe and sober and that's a good thing.

you are way better off without them.


Thank you
Kiddart
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: DUFFMAN] #2989374
11/26/21 04:26 PM
11/26/21 04:26 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 12,496
Warren, MI
71TA Offline
I Live Here
71TA  Offline
I Live Here

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 12,496
Warren, MI
Sorry to dump out my purse here.....

Never heard that. Made me laugh! I'm gonna use that line if you don't mind. Thanks!


www.DetroitMuscleTechnologies.com Mopar body and heater box restoration gaskets
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: 71TA] #2989388
11/26/21 06:22 PM
11/26/21 06:22 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,550
delivering your oil
nutso suave Offline
I Live Here
nutso suave  Offline
I Live Here

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,550
delivering your oil
Good on you Duffman! I remember you posting when this was happening, its crazy that people can be such terds. It's great news that youre feeling better and enjoying things again. I was getting worked up over my car having so many issues...all i could see were the flaws. A good drive and a few thumbs up from people and i remember why i have it in the first place!!

A cummins ram would be an awesome high school rig!

Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: nutso suave] #2989460
11/26/21 09:33 PM
11/26/21 09:33 PM
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 18,688
Fresno, CA
Jim_Lusk Offline
I Live Here
Jim_Lusk  Offline
I Live Here

Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 18,688
Fresno, CA
Can't let others pi$$ in your Wheaties. Congrats on getting back to it.

Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: Jim_Lusk] #2989569
11/27/21 12:19 PM
11/27/21 12:19 PM
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 16,206
Central Florida
larrymopar360 Offline
Stud Muffin
larrymopar360  Offline
Stud Muffin

Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 16,206
Central Florida
Definitely a congrats in order to you AND to having a son interested in a real truck and not a Honda civic LOL!!!!


Facts are stubborn things.
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: DUFFMAN] #2989591
11/27/21 01:02 PM
11/27/21 01:02 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 16,054
Omaha Ne
T
TJP Offline
I Live Here
TJP  Offline
I Live Here
T

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 16,054
Omaha Ne
Kudo's to you for recognizing it up

Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: TJP] #2989663
11/27/21 06:00 PM
11/27/21 06:00 PM
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 6,114
Detroit
Kidsixpack Offline
master
Kidsixpack  Offline
master

Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 6,114
Detroit
I realized a few years ago that I wasn't enjoying my time spent with some of the guys in this hobby so i backed off and tried to do the things that I enjoy. it's been pretty good!
Duffman Shoot me a PM and I can introduce you to a good buddy that buys and sells cummins. His driver in high school was a Dually 5spd cummins!
KID

Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: DUFFMAN] #2989804
11/28/21 09:57 AM
11/28/21 09:57 AM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 5,416
Alpha Seti 5
RoadRunnerLuva Offline
master
RoadRunnerLuva  Offline
master

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 5,416
Alpha Seti 5
Good for you Duffman! I had a similar situation with people I thought were good "friends"....turned out to be a different story...live and learn I guess.
It's very cool to hear your son is looking to get into this hobby, we need all the young guys/gals, we can get, to keep it moving forward. up
Best of luck to you and your son with everything. beer


Plymouth Makes It!
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: RoadRunnerLuva] #2990024
11/28/21 11:16 PM
11/28/21 11:16 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,704
MICHIGAN
DynoDave Offline
master
DynoDave  Offline
master

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,704
MICHIGAN
It sucks that you had to go through that Duffman, but I'm glad you got out of a bad situation, and are enjoying the hobby again. up


DynoDave
Walter P. Chrysler Club - Great Lakes Region
Member # 12304
1970 Plymouth Duster
1972 Dodge Charger Rallye
https://wichargerguy.proboards.com/
1977 Chrysler Cordoba
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: DUFFMAN] #2990158
11/29/21 12:25 PM
11/29/21 12:25 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 7,548
Albany, NY
67SATisfaction Offline
The member whose name is actually Art
67SATisfaction  Offline
The member whose name is actually Art

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 7,548
Albany, NY
Originally Posted by DUFFMAN
For the last 4-5 years my interest in my Mopars has been fading, to the point where I was trying to sell my pride and joy. It turns out that the friends I was hanging out with were dragging me down. Their only interest was hanging out and drinking. They had no motivation to do anything but drink and complain. It took a real tole on me mentally as I thrive on accomplishing things.

...but this community has always been very supportive, and at this point I have very few close friends left.


This is fantastic to hear, Duff... I remember your earlier posts about these friends ..
Glad to hear you got your soul back, and glad to hear your family helped make the difference.

Life isn't always easy for anyone.
It's nice to know we can all be here for eachother.
Cheers,
- Art


65 Satellite hardtop 361/4bbl console 727 2.76
67 Satellite convert 383/2bbl column 727 3.23
67 Lancia Fulvia Sport 1.3 Zagato. Alloy body, 1.3L V4 DOHC 4-spd
67 Lancia Fulvia Rallye 1.3. Alloy panel, 1.3L V4 DOHC 4-spd
71 Alfa Romeo GT Junior 1300 Zagato, 1.3L 4cyl DOHC hemi 5-spd
82 Alfa Romeo GTV6 2.5L SOHC hemi V6 5-spd transaxle
75 Maserati Bora US spec 4.9L DOHC hemi V8 5-spd ZF
77 Maserati Khamsin Euro spec 4.9L DOHC hemi V8 5-spd ZF
07 Aston Martin DB9 6.0L DOHC V12 6spd transaxle
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: 67SATisfaction] #2991081
12/01/21 09:39 PM
12/01/21 09:39 PM
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 11,269
Slantytown
DUFFMAN Offline OP
Ask And Ye Shall Receive
DUFFMAN  Offline OP
Ask And Ye Shall Receive

Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 11,269
Slantytown
Last weekend I drove 4 hours to Indiana to pick up a bent Charger SRT8 hood. The goal is to cut it up and graft the scoop onto a hood for my Magnum SRT8. My son went with me and we had some great conversation. He's happy to have me back and he hates what those "friends" did to me. He's a great kid.


No longer taking $h!t from anyone!
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: DUFFMAN] #2991084
12/01/21 09:56 PM
12/01/21 09:56 PM
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 10,365
Someplace you aren't
S
SomeCarGuy Offline
I Live Here
SomeCarGuy  Offline
I Live Here
S

Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 10,365
Someplace you aren't
I’m lucky to have run off any asshats like that long ago. You don’t want to have any sand caught in yourself around me, I’ll not hold back. Better to have fun your way than to slow down for goobers and their muck and mire.


I want my fair share
Re: I'm finally back to enjoying the hobby [Re: SomeCarGuy] #2992007
12/04/21 02:34 PM
12/04/21 02:34 PM
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 11,269
Slantytown
DUFFMAN Offline OP
Ask And Ye Shall Receive
DUFFMAN  Offline OP
Ask And Ye Shall Receive

Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 11,269
Slantytown
I'm happy when I'm accomplishing things, and my so called "friends" just wanted to sit around, drink, and complain about everything and everyone, even each other. I swear the song "Too much time on my hands" was written about them. They brag up what they're capable of but never follow through on anything. One even bought a project car, and the only progress ever made on it was stuff I did for him. I was the only person he knew that can work on old cars, so I'm sure nothing has been done with it since we parted ways.

What's funny is I didn't realize I had nothing in common with them. I don't run into them at all around town because they don't have the same interests as me. They also taught me how to spot toxic insecurity, and I had to walk away form another "friend" because he started doing the same crap. I treat everyone like an equal, and I've always overlooked people's problems, but this group bit me in the butt so bad that I've become vigilant on metal illness and insecurity. People like these are energy vampires and they suck the life, and happiness, out of you.

Anyway. I spent a lot of time this summer "playing" with my cars. Way more than I have in the last few years. I've also spent more time with my family. All of which has made me much happier.

I really thought the hobby was dead for me.


No longer taking $h!t from anyone!






Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.1