That's the bottom line and the point Jim was getting to I think. If crooks are taking advantage of the ability to have items shipped to a different address then successfully saying they didn't get it so they can get their money refunded, then sellers are going to stop shipping to alternative addresses so they won't get robbed. Don't get mad at the sellers, get mad at the scammers for ruining it for everyone, and the credit card companies for not being more diligent in trying to catch people playing this game, and for not having them prosecuted.
Between issues with shippers losing or damaging packages, and scammers taking advantage of every dishonest scheme they can come up with, I don't envy what businesses have to try to cope with these days with sales. I wouldn't want to do it, and you have to wonder if this will continue the decrease in numbers of small businesses. Pretty soon we may see a day where Amazon, with their own fleet of delivery trucks and whatever forms of payment they feel most secure with, is the only game in town for buying anything online.