My dad passed away just over 20 years, it still hurts enough that I passed by your post a number times without reading. But now that I'm here and see you are 18, I can't begin to understand your pain. I will say that in the most positive way, you have not "lost" your Dad, you get keep his memories forever. Sounds like he was a good Dad.
Reality check, that half the population is smarter then 50% of the people and it's a constantly contested fact.
