Civil but discreet.

Agreed. That was stupid of you. Keep your mouth shut from here on out. If she confronts you, talk about your feelings and evade facts. I don't think committing to dumping $300/mo on warehouse space is in your best interests right now until you move into a new home and get settled. I would think about putting that extra money into renting a small house with a garage but at this point any of that is premature IMO.

Satellite73, If you want to get your wife back, here is an idea that MAY work. I do not know your wife, so you have to use your own judgement. Of course, BEFORE you try this, TALK TO YOUR LAWYER!! Make certain this can NOT hurt you later in the divorce proceedings, if it does not get your wife back. In my state, adultery has essentially no weight in divorce court. In your state, it could be different.

My friend's wife left him. Within days of her moving out, he started dating other women. The new women were younger and more attractive than his wife. He did NOT tell his wife what he was doing. But he posted quite a few pictures of his dates on his Facebook page. (He posts on Facebook regularly, so this was perfectly normal for him.) He showed where they went and the fun they had together. He was happy and all smiles without his wife. I believe it was the third woman he posted, who was quite beautiful, that got his wife to call. She thought they should get back together. Apparently, she had grown quite jealous!! She wanted to hurt him by leaving, but he was having way to much fun to lose even a wink of sleep over her. He took her back and they are still together.

If you decide to try this and are not on facebook already, let some of her friends see you with your new date. The news will get back to her! Probably along with the pictures her friends took with their smart phones! But make certain, IN ADVANCE, that you will not be hurting yourself if the divorce does goes through. So, talk to your lawyer....TODAY!!!

Divorce isn't something to be used as a negotiating tactic. It's akin to pressing the launch button and expecting the other party to then pull up a chair at the diplomacy table. Say you are able to patch things back together - this the kind of relationship you want?

Ugh, sorry. So much good info and insight above.

What she did was crappy and shows a lack of empathy that is troubling.

Your reality now is that she wants you out and wants a divorce.

Divorce is a civil procedure and you need a lawyer. Yes, you can proceed without one but it would not be in your best interest. Get a good one.

One thing we don't know here is what your relative incomes are. If she is pulling down more dough, there could be a surprise for her.

Also on the house - sure it is in her name, but did you contribute to the upkeep, upgrades, repairs, taxes, etc? You might be entitled to 50% of the appreciation of the house and maybe more. A good lawyer will suss that out for you - every state is different in that regard.

DO NOT share your plans with her. Your lawyer (when you get one) is your strategist - don't tip your hand to her and her lawyer.

I don't know how long you were married but I am sorry for the hurt and the inconvenience.

I was married 7 years and kicked my useless narcissist wife out after I had enough. It's tough on the kids, and tough on me not see the kids more than 50% of the time, but otherwise it's been a lifesaver.

I am happy to have that negativity out of my life - much less stressed over here. I also managed to keep ALL of my stuff. How? She didn't get a lawyer.

That's a good thing...

You got her attention...


Now, proceed...

And keep it under yer hat...


Go in it, to win it...

Yup, go to WIN!!! No holds barred. Go for the throat! Be MEAN about EVERYTHING!!! If she crys, GOOD, means you are getting to her, use the crying to YOUR advantage, such as, "Why didn't you cry when so and so happened?" and "You never liked my mother anyway". Be sure the court/judge knows and hears EVERYTHING!

Well, the consult was interesting.

Being that this is a public site and not private, no real details will be given at this time.

I hope ya'll understand.

Thanks for the support everyone.

My cousin (well known family wise guy/know it all) went through with a divorce with no lawyer, "Nothing but crooks" I believe was his words. He was lucky he still had his pants when it was done.

Just sayin'.....

Pretty much all the guys I know who got screwed over in a divorce either had a cheap lawyer or no lawyer. You can get along fine that way if your soon to be ex doesn't want to fight, but if she does........

THIS....and keep the wagon..or sell it to a trusted friend who will sell it back after your personal storm passes.And it doesn't sound like this was the first hurricane she's been thru, so it shouldn't have been that much of a big deal for her. Guaranteed if it had been HER Dad that had a tumor removed she would have been with him

As of 9:30 AM June 19th, 2018, I am officially 240 lbs lighter.

While I consulted a lawyer, I didn't have one represent me at the hearing.

As per the decree I do not have a set time I have to vacate the property, so we're still under the same roof for the time being.

When we got back from the hearing, she cried some. No not about me, the reality of just how many more bills she's going to be taking on set in. She has to find a room mate or file bankruptcy.

My name is off all joint bills, so I'm not worried about it.

The bank did a hardship refinance on her car to get me off of it. They had to run the loan out almost 5 yrs to get the payment down, so she will being paying 9 yrs (total) for her 2014 Kia.

Finances are gonna be tight for me simply because I don't earn a lot, but, as of right now, aside from a student loan I'll always have, I have nothing but daily/monthly expenses.

Thanks everyone.

One last piece of advice, RUN FORREST RUN!

Robert

John, Sorry to hear of the difficulties but sounds like you made as clean a break as anyone could ever have. Best wishes to you buddy. Rich

Texas is a community property state, which means that most property acquired during marriage belongs to both spouses and must be divided at divorce. In contrast, each spouse gets to keep his or her separate property when the marriage ends.


https://www.divorcenet.com/states/texas/txfaq02

240 pounds????

She was a big girl....

Rosie?

Bet she still is!

Sorry to hear it turned out this way, John.
Best of luck to you, buddy.


Tim