Have you tried bouncing any ideas off anybody at tire store? I would imagine someone has run across this problem before and had a pretty good method of solving his problem without damaging the wheel - specially with all the aftermarket/alloy wheels on cars these days...

Good luck with it.

On mine, I was able to put 3/4" box end wrench (on which I had to remove half of the wrench to get it into the well of the wheel itself between the spokes [AR 200S wheel]) on the nut to keep it from spinning. Then starting drilling (and grinding) (and taking time off for sanity). 3 days later it was off.