Made a mistake this morning

In the dark, getting old .. grabbed the Ben Gay instead of preparation H
















lol

At least you didn't mistake it for the toothpaste.

In the 1980s I had an intelligent electrician who left a bottle of Locktite in his pants.
He took the Locktite bottle out of the pants pocket before bed and set on the top of the cabinet with keys, pocket knife, etc.
Also on top of this cabinet was a small squeeze bottle of his Glaucoma medicine drops.

Guess what happened the next morning?

Just before Thanksgiving my ex-brother in law mistook superglue for his eye drops. Fortunately it burned so bad he only did one eye. Off to the emergency room, don't know what all transpired but at Thanksgiving dinner there weren't any eyelashes yet. Pro tip, don't put your super glue on the end table next to the eye drops.

Don’t laugh… I came within a second of doing exactly that on a trip.

“Travel” toothpaste tubes, and preparation H are remarkably similar in size!

Worse yet, on a overnight visit to a relative’s house, i darned near washed my hair in their shower with “Nair” instead of shampoo!

I ought never to drink!

When I was a in my teens, I used spray deodorant. At the time I was still building model cars too. (Don't get ahead of me). One bleary morning I grabbed a spray can of model paint instead of my deodorant. :

Sprayed both pits then the smell hit me. Looked in the mirror, I had sprayed them bright orange.........

I moved my deodorant to the other side of the room after that.

I have had several kidney stones and they always seem to come on Friday nights... one time after coming home from the emergency room I was heavily medicated from pain meds.. the phone rang on the nightstand and I picked up a lamp and tried to answer it!!! awhile later with Saturday being race day I got out of bed and told my wife I am going racing bit for some reason I couldn't find any of my keys.. just my good wife looking out for me.

Hmmm...I worked with a classic-car-hauler buddy for awhile, and on occasion he'd pee in a 1-gallon plastic water bottle.
Like the ones for distilled or drinking water, which were also behind the seat.
When you're waking up in the truck, still beat-to-death-tired after several round trips to Pebble Beach, and you reach behind the seat where the water is...

It could have made you really sad Dad if you’d done that when you decided to GREASE YUR JUNK !

I keep a large bottle of eyeglass cleaner beside my deodorant in a vanity drawer. Twice I have unsuccessfully attempted to clean my glasses with deodorant.

Or you could have done like the main character in American Pie. Grabbed the super glue instead of the oil so he could cuff the carrot.

I used to work with a guy who grabbed Vapo-Rub instead of Vaseline when he was romancing his wife. He never did that again.

Wow, that is right up there with spraying cologne down below.

I had a travel sized tube of toothpaste and one of athletes foot cream in a travel bag on a trip once. One of them tasted horrible.

One bleary morning years ago I took my dog's allergy medicine instead of my blood pressure medicine. I felt OK but I kept having this urge to chase cars and catch a Frisbee in my mouth.

Indeed they are. I actually did start to brush my teeth with Preparation H once, in the dark. It did not taste good.
But my lips were nice and tight

before we were married, my wife once put nose drops in her eyes thinking they were eye drops after smoking a few doobies with her GF. She was trying to avoid getting busted as I never partook. Can you say BUSTED !!! LOL

This is exactly why I tell anyone that chews tobacco that they can chew in my truck but they better not leave their spit bottle in it when they get out.