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Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: Droop69] #2844936
11/11/20 03:34 PM
11/11/20 03:34 PM
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
J
JP8 Offline OP
member
JP8  Offline OP
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Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
Originally Posted by Droop69
So sad to hear about your Brother. Please get some help for you and your parents.

God bless.


My brother was self medicating. Not a good plan. I have been trying to work with the VA as much as possible. They like to prescribe meds, that’s for sure. This ziplock bag is what I used to be on. I’ve got it down to two meds with the VA now.
I also work with Millennium TBI and Dr. Mark Gordon. I pay about $1000 a quarter out of pocket for that. This is a personal investment to keep my memory, sanity, and family intact. Dr. Mark Gordon is an endocrinologist that works with a lot of Special Forces/ SEAL types. A lot of what happens with TBI’s is hormonal. I do blood work every quarter for him and he adjusts some meds for me. I take DHEA, Vitamin D, Pregnenolone, and some liquids (proprietary blends of CoQ10, vitamin B’s, ...).
The millennium tbi stuff I’m doing helps much more than the VA drugs. I would rather fix hormonal imbalances in my brain than fill my body with Xanax and Sertraline.
If you know of a TBI recipient please have them look into Millennium http://www.tbimedlegal.com/
If you know of a military, police, or firefighter with a TBI they can get a grant for Millennium services through Warrior Angels Foundation. If you want to donate so that grants can be made available https://www.classy.org/fundraiser/701370



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Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: JP8] #2845006
11/11/20 06:30 PM
11/11/20 06:30 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 9,100
Tucson, AZ
Ramrod39 Offline
My New Title
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My New Title

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 9,100
Tucson, AZ
So sorry to hear this.

Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: Ramrod39] #2845094
11/11/20 09:26 PM
11/11/20 09:26 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 70,126
Here
DirectSubjection Offline
Tacohead. The First and Only
DirectSubjection  Offline
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Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 70,126
Here
So sorry to hear this - thank you for sharing the story.


Ride eternal, shiny and chrome
Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: JP8] #2845189
11/12/20 03:41 AM
11/12/20 03:41 AM
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 10,115
A Red State
SNK-EYZ Offline
I Live Here
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Posts: 10,115
A Red State
I'm so sorry to hear of you and your family's loss. angel


Kayse can't keep up at all now. lol
Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: JP8] #2845199
11/12/20 07:04 AM
11/12/20 07:04 AM
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 126
Kansas
6
65fury Offline
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Joined: Mar 2004
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Kansas
I took a screenshot of your post with your med information as I know someone who may benefit from this. I just wanted you to know that whatever force brought you here to post this, also brought me here at 4 am (to a site I check once every few months) to stumble across it.

So sorry for your loss but I’m glad you bared your soul here for us. Thank you.

Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: JP8] #2845220
11/12/20 10:18 AM
11/12/20 10:18 AM
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,365
St. Charles, MO
wingman Offline
Uncreative Title
wingman  Offline
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Posts: 3,365
St. Charles, MO
Originally Posted by JP8
I have been trying to work with the VA as much as possible. They like to prescribe meds, that’s for sure.


Sadly, it's not just the VA.

My wife is a school nurse. It would sicken you if you knew how many kids were prescribed serious meds for supposed "behavioral" issues these days.
Often at a very young age--as young as kindergarten or first grade.
Often at the recommendation of the teacher or parent.
And almost always boys.

Of course there are some kids that do have serious issues. But in a many cases, it just a kid with a lot of energy that they just want him to be quiet and sit still...

They have no idea what long-term unintended consequences this drug "soup" will have on these young, still developing minds.
I'm concerned the suicide epidemic will get worse before it gets better.


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Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: wingman] #2845308
11/12/20 01:18 PM
11/12/20 01:18 PM
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 22,695
Bitopia
J
jcc Offline
If you can't dazzle em with diamonds..
jcc  Offline
If you can't dazzle em with diamonds..
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 22,695
Bitopia
RIP angel

I hope your parents can handle all the soul searching they likely will endure for having a loaded firearm accessible in such a volatile environment.

This will be a long recovery for everybody.


Reality check, that half the population is smarter then 50% of the people and it's a constantly contested fact.
Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: jcc] #2845360
11/12/20 02:19 PM
11/12/20 02:19 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 3,653
The Historic Hudson Valley
MONC Offline
master
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Posts: 3,653
The Historic Hudson Valley
So tragic, my heartfelt condolences to you and your family.

If you are happy with the meds and supplements , and are managing well that is great.

If not, have you considered the monitored trials of MDMA or Psilocybin ?
May be worth exploring.

MAPS LINK

All the best


Mopar
Or
No
Car
Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: MONC] #2845400
11/12/20 03:21 PM
11/12/20 03:21 PM
Joined: May 2014
Posts: 206
Paducah, KY USA Earth
J
jcruse64 Offline
enthusiast
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enthusiast
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Joined: May 2014
Posts: 206
Paducah, KY USA Earth
Very sorry to hear this.

Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: JP8] #2845445
11/12/20 04:52 PM
11/12/20 04:52 PM
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 20,600
in a cattle trailer down by th...
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Guitar Jones Offline
Paddle faster! I hear banjo music!
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Posts: 20,600
in a cattle trailer down by th...
So very sad and tragic. I wish there was more I could do besides pray for you and your family. Our veterans deserve the best treatments available, it's a real disgrace that our government doesn't do more. May God bless you and your family.


"Follow me the wise man said, but he walked behind"


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Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: JP8] #2845466
11/12/20 05:54 PM
11/12/20 05:54 PM
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,655
SK. Canada
Not_A_Duster Offline
master
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Posts: 7,655
SK. Canada
I really don't know what to say without sounding shallow. My heart aches for you & your parents.

There's a guy in my car club who was an "in country" Canadian Paratrooper that I think I need to go spend some time with...... I suffered a severe head injury myself about 10 years ago, which has negatively altered large parts of my personality but nothing like what guys like you, your brother & him deal with daily.

Yeah - I need to reach out to him.


....evil is winning....
Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: jcc] #2845598
11/13/20 01:25 AM
11/13/20 01:25 AM
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
J
JP8 Offline OP
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JP8  Offline OP
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Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
Originally Posted by jcc
RIP angel

I hope your parents can handle all the soul searching they likely will endure for having a loaded firearm accessible in such a volatile environment.

This will be a long recovery for everybody.


I don't understand what you are getting at. This was not a volatile environment. It was a volatile situation. My brother did not live with my parents. The environment is a comfortable home in the country where a 65 and 66 year old live quietly. There are plenty of reasons to have a loaded firearm in your bedroom. They are folks who do not have the physical strength to defend themselves if someone is trying to break in the house at night. There are plenty of animals that prey on their pets. They have horses and outside cats that coyotes love to harass. There have been meth addicts out in their rural area looking for easy targets to steal from. They live where it can take 15-20-30 minutes for a Sheriff's Deputy to reach their house.

I want to restate that this was/is not a volatile environment. The environment is quiet and peaceful. My brother came over and was in the kitchen and asked for money to score some meth and party one last night before going into a VA Mental Health Facility for at least a week. My parents said no initially. They ended up leaving him and going into their bedroom to discuss what to do. Have him stay there, pray, maybe give in and give him the money. He left the kitchen and barged in to their bedroom and acted swiftly and violently.



Last edited by JP8; 11/13/20 02:12 AM.

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Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: Not_A_Duster] #2845599
11/13/20 01:36 AM
11/13/20 01:36 AM
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
J
JP8 Offline OP
member
JP8  Offline OP
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Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
Originally Posted by Not_A_Duster
I really don't know what to say without sounding shallow. My heart aches for you & your parents.

There's a guy in my car club who was an "in country" Canadian Paratrooper that I think I need to go spend some time with...... I suffered a severe head injury myself about 10 years ago, which has negatively altered large parts of my personality but nothing like what guys like you, your brother & him deal with daily.

Yeah - I need to reach out to him.


Do it. Don't be shy about talking about anything like suicide. Don't tell anyone you think they are going to act but just bring up the subject without making him feel like you're suspicious of his behaviors. Just let him know that IF he ever feels in despair to always, anytime, call. Tell him you love him. Tell him you love him for being willing to lay down his life for your's and others. It will hit him with weight. Believe me.

And for you, a brain injury is a brain injury. A bomb or a car wreck, you're brain takes the hit. If you have brain fog and memory issues it is inflammation. Please look into Millennium. Find an endocrinologist to test your hormones. Inflammation of the brain causes hormone imbalance.


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Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: MONC] #2845602
11/13/20 01:46 AM
11/13/20 01:46 AM
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
J
JP8 Offline OP
member
JP8  Offline OP
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Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
Originally Posted by MONC
have you considered the monitored trials of MDMA or Psilocybin ?






I have considered it. I will have to look more into it. Thank you.


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Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: JP8] #2845613
11/13/20 07:35 AM
11/13/20 07:35 AM
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 22,695
Bitopia
J
jcc Offline
If you can't dazzle em with diamonds..
jcc  Offline
If you can't dazzle em with diamonds..
J

Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 22,695
Bitopia
Originally Posted by JP8
Originally Posted by jcc
RIP angel

I hope your parents can handle all the soul searching they likely will endure for having a loaded firearm accessible in such a volatile environment.

This will be a long recovery for everybody.


I don't understand what you are getting at. This was not a volatile environment. It was a volatile situation. My brother did not live with my parents. The environment is a comfortable home in the country where a 65 and 66 year old live quietly. There are plenty of reasons to have a loaded firearm in your bedroom. They are folks who do not have the physical strength to defend themselves if someone is trying to break in the house at night. There are plenty of animals that prey on their pets. They have horses and outside cats that coyotes love to harass. There have been meth addicts out in their rural area looking for easy targets to steal from. They live where it can take 15-20-30 minutes for a Sheriff's Deputy to reach their house.

I want to restate that this was/is not a volatile environment. The environment is quiet and peaceful. My brother came over and was in the kitchen and asked for money to score some meth and party one last night before going into a VA Mental Health Facility for at least a week. My parents said no initially. They ended up leaving him and going into their bedroom to discuss what to do. Have him stay there, pray, maybe give in and give him the money. He left the kitchen and barged in to their bedroom and acted swiftly and violently.


My comment was directed towards the responsible parties of the weapon involved, our opinions/perspectives don't really matter, so ask your parents what they are thinking if you want to be supportive. In a personal tragedy, placing blame is often a common defense/coping mechanism, and sometimes that blame is directed inwards.

Last edited by jcc; 11/13/20 07:40 AM.

Reality check, that half the population is smarter then 50% of the people and it's a constantly contested fact.
Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: jcc] #2845621
11/13/20 08:28 AM
11/13/20 08:28 AM
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 957
MI, Lapeer
M
maximus Offline
super stock
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 957
MI, Lapeer
I know what you are going through. I lost my brother-in-law to suicide from drug addition. You blame yourself for not trying to help more but it doesn't change anything. Every person fights their own demons. You try to help in every way you can but the person is his own, he will do what he feels and wants. My good buddy lost his brother and brother-in-law both to suicide. All this free help is a bunch of BS. I spent days trying to help my brother-in-law. All I got was the run around, I ended up were I started from. Unless you have good insurance or a big pocket book, you will get no help from anybody, period. I feel sorry for your loss. May God Bless you and your family.

Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: maximus] #2845656
11/13/20 10:27 AM
11/13/20 10:27 AM
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
J
JP8 Offline OP
member
JP8  Offline OP
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Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 168
San Diego
Originally Posted by maximus
All I got was the run around, I ended up were I started from.


Yep. We all tried so many times. So many trips to drop him off at NA and AA. My parents gave him rides to the VA and he would blow up on them on the way there. So much money was given to him to make rent or payments. He was an expert at using people.

The treatment I am using never would have not worked with him. He couldn't stop using drugs and alcohol. Just couldn't.I wish he could have but we all knew he would do something like this or die in a drug deal gone wrong or something.


Thanks for all the support guys. It means a lot.


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Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: JP8] #2845726
11/13/20 01:23 PM
11/13/20 01:23 PM
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,819
Middle of A Field
O
OrangeProwler Offline
top fuel
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,819
Middle of A Field
Sorry to hear about your brother. I think the best piece of advice I can offer is to remember the good times with your brother and try to move forward but, not forget.

Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: OrangeProwler] #2845772
11/13/20 02:58 PM
11/13/20 02:58 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,248
North Carolina
4
469runner Offline
pro stock
469runner  Offline
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Posts: 1,248
North Carolina
I am so sorry to read this. I too am a Veteran, retired after 26 years of active duty in the Army. While I never suffered a traumatic brain injury, or was ever diagnosed with PTSD, I realize I feel angry a lot and it does affect ones life following service. I have been out almost 4 years, my wife says it is time I seek help. Unfortunately, the VA is little help in these matters. To make matters worse, the quality of care for veterans is sorely lacking. I hope your family comes to realize there really wasn't anything anyone could do. Your brother was struggling and sadly couldn't take it anymore. God only knows what he had to endure besides the PTSD and TBI. I pray for peace for your family and all veterans.
'

Re: Veteran Suicide- My Brother [Re: 469runner] #2845801
11/13/20 04:23 PM
11/13/20 04:23 PM
Joined: Aug 2019
Posts: 9,294
Super Spudsville
Mr PotatoHead Online rolleyes
Half Baked
Mr PotatoHead  Online Rolleyes
Half Baked

Joined: Aug 2019
Posts: 9,294
Super Spudsville
Its a sad situation with the end result not uncommon. Reading your comments its easy to think how did it get that far to end that way but that is not uncommon either. I fight the VA all the time on my treatment for exposure thats destroyed my lungs, im angry alot because I cant get the air I need. So I try to keep life simple.

My wife I care for has a brain stem issue (stroke) and unlike a TBI she has alot of the same issues but I decided to bone up the other night on TBI-s related to service members and was a bit disappointed at the vague information but also understand the general public would not understand the in depth explanation unless they had a reason to dig deeper.

I read about the honeycomb effect of the TBI-s and thats semi easy to grasp but it seems there are many causes.

I feel vets in general and like me that went in at a young age find it as a way of life only to get out to have to live in a totally different world and ive seen it compared in some ways to ones who went to prison young trying to adapt to a different world upon release.

Clearly I dont have the answers, there is no simple answer or a one size fit all answer for each person. Keeping life as simple as possible and stress free as possible is a obvious benefit.

It just sucks all around, I dont know how else to put it. My biggest mistake was getting out, should of been a lifer. Its just hard to go from living life at 110% and on edge all the time to living in a non structured slack ass society.

If you feel like answering this question feel free to or not. But what do you feel the VA and care system in general could be or should be doing different to better help vets with TBI issues? Clearly the bag of pills to mask things isnt the answer for many.


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