I hit the Powerball

Only the Powerball. $4 winner and doubled my money.

Be sure to spread your new found wealth around. Don't spend it all at one place!

That is more then I have ever won playing Powerball, but they tell me I have to buy a ticket before I can win anything.

Reminds me of the guy that had a similar win and told he wife he won the lottery. She told him to give her half and she wanted a divorce. He gave her $2 and gave her the divorce.

I spent most of it on women and fast cars. The rest I just wasted.

i'm your long lost cousin on your aunt's nephew's brother's wife's side.
i just know you are a very generous soul, and believe in sharing your wealth.
so when can i expect my "share" ?..................

I did too. Kneeled on the floor for a minute until I caught my breath, then laid on the couch with a bag of peas from the freezer.

After taxes you will owe $6.13